


Of Love and War

by Rheaird_of_Life



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 10:17:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3646581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rheaird_of_Life/pseuds/Rheaird_of_Life
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lexa knows how to win wars, but dealing with a drunken Clarke is an entirely different matter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jus Slip Daun

**I've posted this elsewhere but decided to put it here as well. Made some slight modifications. I hope this makes you laugh or at least smile a bit. ;D**

* * *

 The war with the mountain men had come to a close and her people were celebrating their victory around a great bonfire. Many danced to the music of their ancestors. She reclined in her makeshift throne and periodically looked across the fray and towards Clarke and her drinking friends. Clarke noticed her gaze, and when she was rid of them, started to approach. However, that dark haired sky boy, (or as people now christened him, Sky Lord, the saviour of her people) got to her first. Lexa was slightly irritated but didn't let it show. The more Clarke danced around the boy, the more annoyed Lexa became. Just as she decided to join the dance, one of the seconds from the Ice Nation came over and whispered in her ear. Apparently trouble was afoot among the clans...already. Lexa spared one last withering look at Clarke and Bellamy and then attended to her duties.

* * *

It was hours later before the disagreement had been resolved. By then the revelry had come to an end and there was nothing left to do but go to bed, something she was all too keen on. She pushed through the darkened flaps and allowed herself to audibly yawn, a sure sign of weakness. Lexa placed her weapons on the central war planning table and then sat down on the bed to pull her heavy and blood spattered boots off. As soon as her weight depressed the bed, there was a rustling sound and she jumped up and whirled around, squinting in the darkness for her assailant (she suspected a two headed snake) to make their move.

Since she still couldn't see what was under the large bear pelt she used as her blanket, she lit a torch and held it aloft. It definitely didn't seem like a snake, but she poked it all the same with the wooden edge of the torch.

"Watch it!" yelped a familiar voice from beneath. As the cover was pulled down, a tangled web of blonde hair was exposed as well as a grumpy looking Clarke.

" _Clarke_?!" Lexa half yelled, nearly dropping the torch and setting the bed on fire. "What are you doing?"

Granted she was glad that Clarke had not lain with that sky boy, and had chosen her instead, but even so, she wasn't really in the mood to deal with this right now. All she wanted to do was sleep.

After Clarke became accustomed to the light, she focused on Lexa's face, and then suddenly realizing who it was - as if this would be so confusing considering the locale - smiled up at her in a way Lexa hadn't seen before from Clarke. In a way that Costia used to look at her. For a second she forgot to breathe.

Clarke turned on her side and patted the space in front of her. "Come to bed, commander."

Not trusting herself in this matter, Lexa took a step further away from temptation. She deemed it a necessary precaution against the one person she couldn't say no to for very long.

"What has changed?" Lexa asked. "Why do you suddenly desire to be with me?"

Clarke shrugged and as she did so, more of the blanket gave way, revealing a bare shoulder.

_Oh no_ , thought Lexa as she took notice of the pieces of clothing around the bed.

She took another step back.

"I just decided I was ready."

There was something off about Clarke's voice and definitely something off with her behaviour. Lexa thought back to earlier in the night and remembered Clarke had been drinking with her friends, and who knew how much more she had imbibed since her departure. Suddenly everything made sense. The commander closed herself off and said, "You are intoxicated."

"Thank you," she said with a giggle. "Right back at you."

It took a moment for her tired brain to comprehend this response. "No, not intoxica _ting_ , intoxica _ted_!"

Clarke gave her dumb look. "I don't see the difference."

Lexa refrained from huffing in frustration. "Well, that just proves my point!" Sternly, "Now please leave my tent before you embarrass yourself further. I am very weary and would like to rest."

Without warning Clarke started to make a terrible sound. The leader of The Sky People was leaking from her eyes!

"Master your emotions!" hissed a mortified Lexa. "Such sounds are not befitting of a leader! _Shof op_!"

"You don't like me anymore do you?" she said despairingly and then continued to cry, turning away from her.

There was a rap on the side of the tent. "Heda, do you require assistance?"

"No. Gonot osir."

Clarke was still blubbering. "Your commander...commands you to stop acting like a babe!"

Thankfully this seemed to work and she quieted down. Clarke gazed at her with renewed interest. "So you _do_ think I'm hot."

_Chit?!_

"I think you're smokin' too."

Lexa was starting to wonder if she were drunk as well. She had no idea what Clarke was saying. Now she really wished it had been a two headed snake, at least she knew how to deal with something like that. Clarke was a much more baffling creature to figure out at the best of times, and this was considerably far removed from those.

Before she knew what was happening, Clarke had tossed aside the bear skin pelt and patted the spot in front of her again. Lexa's eyes immediately snapped to the blonde woman's glorious physique and stayed there. She had dreamed of this very occurrence many a night since meeting her. Lexa's imaginings had not done Clarke justice. Even battered and bruised from the war, she was sublime.

Clarke ran a hand along her side. "That's right, Lexa, soak it all in."

Lexa knew if she yelled at her again, Clarke would just start crying, so she very calmly, or as calmly as she could manage given the considerable blow to her composure said, "Yes, you are breathtaking, Clarke." She forgot what else she was supposed to be saying and continued to stare. Slowly she remembered herself, holding the torch away so she couldn't see. "But as I said before, I am very weary and need to rest." Lexa said this as her heart raced. "This is something I cannot do if you are in my bed."

"Of course you can," Clarke said grinning idiotically. "There's plenty of room for two."

A brief moment of weakness almost had her giving in. It had been a long time since she had been with anyone. With a determined air, Lexa put aside the torch and collected Clarke's clothing. Then keeping her eyes averted, she held them out to her. The next thing she knew she had been pulled into the bed with Clarke! Naked Clarke! Lovely Naked Clarke wrapped her limbs around her like one of the monstrous lake creatures her people knew to avoid, and just as if it really were one, Lexa was literally paralysed to the spot! Then to make matters worse, the determined creature began nuzzling her earlobe and neck!

_Sis!_

"Clarke," Lexa said shakily with the last shreds of her composure, "I need you to listen very carefully." Clarke started to suckle on her sensitive skin and Lexa's mind went blank. With a will that only she possessed, she gained control of her voice. "If you do not let me go right now I will surely take advantage of you. I have no desire to do this. I respect you too much for that. So please get dressed and go back to your own tent. _Beja_."

Clarke stopped the pleasant ministrations and Lexa turned her head to find her making that no good babe face again.

"Do not even think about it," warned Lexa.

And just like that Clarke began crying some more. It was considerably more unpleasant now that it was right beside her ear.

Her new bodyguard, Maxin, barged in this time, weapons drawn. "Heda!?"

The torch was illuminating them enough that Maxin stopped dead in his tracks when he saw such a bizarre display. Lexa was nearly beside herself at his intrusion. No one was permitted to lay eyes on Clarke in all her glory, no one except for herself!

"Get out!" she roared. "Before I have to kill you!"

The frightened and bewildered warrior fled. And Clarke cried harder.

"No, not you, Clarke. I would never harm you."

Blessedly these words soothed the beast.

"Nor I you."

Clarke began lazily kissing up her neck.

The only way to get away from her was to touch her...but by so doing Lexa would probably give in to her almost overwhelming desire. But if she didn't act soon, Clarke would start kissing her mouth instead and she would definitely give in. Of that she had no doubt.

Praying to the Wood Gods for strength, she prepared to make contact with Clarke's warm and enticing flesh.

Apparently her prayers were answered because Clarke's lips stopped their devilish progress and Lexa opened her eyes to find Clarke had passed out. The iron grip dissipated and she shrugged her way out of Clarke's embrace. While this was a blessed relief, she now had another concern, namely the issue of getting Clarke back to her own tent and how to dress her without coming across the same 'touching' dilemma. Finally, Lexa acted rashly, she wrapped Clarke up in the bear skin pelt, very carefully making sure no intimate areas were exposed and then poked her head out of the tent.

Thanks to all of the noise they had made, a curious crowd had developed just outside.

"Back in your tents now!" she ordered. "This does not concern you! And if I see even _one_ of you sneak a peek, you will _all_ suffer the consequences."

Everyone scurried to do as she bade.

Now that the coast was clear, she quickly made her way to Clarke's tent with Clarke herself in her arms. Thankfully they had been here long enough for Lexa to know which one was hers even in the dark, and thankfully it was not too far away from her own so the ordeal was short lived.

With the excitement at an end, she took a moment to just observe Clarke in her unconscious state, watching the slow rise and fall of her chest. Lexa sighed, wishing things could have gone differently. But she had never been very lucky in the ways of love, so why should this time be any different?

* * *

Lexa lay down in her own bed fully clothed in the blood and grime of many mountain men, eyes wide open. The bed was still warm where Clarke had laid, even smelled like her.

She doubted she would get to sleep tonight...or ever again.

* * *

**Chit = What**

**Gonot osir = Leave us.**

**Shof op = Be quiet**

**Sis = help**

**Beja = Please**


	2. Rude Awakenings

**Hard to top drunk, horny Clarke but I did try my best. ;)  
**

* * *

Clarke awoke bleary eyed and with all the makings of a massive hangover. At least, she thought that's what the terrible pounding in her skull signified. She had never been one to overindulge in alcohol, preferring to keep her wits about her at all times, so her experiences in this regard were rather limited. When she tried to reach up to touch her shattering skull, she found that her limbs were constricted by something. For a second she panicked at her immobility and squirmed around like a snake caught in a trap. Some logic returned and she looked down to find she was wrapped very tightly from head to toe in a large pelt of some sort. From this vantage point, all she could tell was that it was made out of something black, and considerably warmer than her own deer skin. In fact, with it this tightly wrapped around her, and the sun now thawing the night's cold away, she was positively burning up. And the more she focused on how hot she was, the more she realized she was sweating profusely, which led to the unsettling realization that she was completely unclothed!

"What the hell?" she murmured to herself, as she squirmed around some more. This still did not have the desired effect, so using some more of her limited faculties, she rolled sideways instead. Of course she overdid it and went straight off the bed, the landing jarring her bruised brain painfully, and coming to a stop several feet away. But she could live with this now that she had succeeded in freeing herself from the devilish constraints.

"Freedom," she sighed contentedly, spreading out eagle style on her stomach. She was so relieved to be freed and so not in the mood to move anymore that she simply stayed that way for awhile, enjoying the light breeze that played across her bare ass.

If not for her raging migraine, and the fact that she had to urinate horribly, she would have gratefully dozed off again. As it was, she forced herself up and blinked around for her clothes. They were neatly folded on her wooden chair. Clarke liked order in most respects, but by the end of the day she usually just tossed her outer coverings there and fell into bed.

"What the hell?" she said again with a frown.

Who had undressed her and then attended to her clothing so methodically?

She would have ruminated on this matter further but her bladder called insistently and she hastily threw her things on and stumbled out of the tent and into the glare of a thousand suns! Or so it seemed to Clarke in her current incapacitated state. She held her hand up against the evil sky being, silently cursing it, and stalked over to the nearest hole in the ground to do her business.

It took an insanely long time to relieve herself fully and by then other grounder women had shown up and were impatiently waiting. One of them ungraciously muttered something in Trigedasleng that she thought might have roughly translated to 'The Sky Princess has found her true throne.'

The other grounders laughed and after she was done she marched over to them and said, "The throne is all yours."

Judging by their taken aback expressions, she figured she had translated right, even as out of it as she was. Or perhaps they had no idea what she was talking about. In any case, she went back into her tent to get some relief from the sunny day and also try to piece together last night's events. Clarke plopped into her chair and closed her eyes in an effort to remember. She had drunk a little and danced with her friends around the bonfire. Then she had drunk some more at their insistence, a _lot_ more come to think of it, and then...she wasn't really sure what happened next.

She thought maybe Bellamy had tried to kiss her at one point, but she couldn't be certain. She recalled the boys passing out right there around the dying bonfire and then she had gone somewhere by herself...but _where_ was the question.

Clarke opened her blood shot eyes and studied the pelt on the floor. A big black bear skin. Who did she know who had something like that?

Slowly comprehension dawned through her sluggish brain.

_Lexa._

A string of impressive swear words escaped her chapped lips as more and more of her misadventure came back to her. By the end of her hazy remembrances, she was utterly mortified and she put her head in her hands, wishing she could get into a time machine and go back to before she had taken a single drink.

Sure the mountain men were defeated but she would still need to convene with Lexa about her people's next steps, whatever those might be. As such, there was no way to avoid the commander for very long today. If she didn't go to her, Lexa would just send someone to come and get her instead and they wouldn't leave until they had escorted her back there. Back to the tent where that incredibly embarrassing encounter took place. She cringed every time she thought about how much she had cried. Lexa must have been disgusted by her pathetic display and probably regretted ever showing any romantic interest in her. How could the fearsome grounder commander take pride in a great big cry baby for a partner?

Briefly she contemplated fleeing the camp and taking her chances in the wilderness, rather than face Lexa again. Even another pauna would be a less terrifying prospect! Hell a pack of them would be preferable!

Clarke started to hyperventilate and hopped up, pacing around her tent in an effort to calm herself down. This wasn't working very well, so in a fit of panic, she scooped up the bearskin and flung it outside the tent, as if that would suddenly make everything better. Someone said 'hey!' loudly and then _Octavia_ poked her head in with the offending object in hand, holding it like it was both a piece of garbage and the holy grail.

Clarke stopped pacing and froze like a two headed deer caught in spaceship headlights.

"Clarke?" she said quizzically. "What were you doing with this?"

Of all the people who happened to be passing by, Octavia was the worst! They still weren't on the best of terms and she might see this as a way of getting back at her. She had to play it cool and not act suspicious in the least.

"I-I don't know what you mean," Clarke said hurriedly, looking away.

Octavia stepped in further and held it in front of her face so that it was impossible to ignore. Beneath her own musky scent, she could smell Lexa on it at this range. "This right here, the gross, sweaty thing you just threw at my head- this is the commander's. I'm sure of it."

Close to having a nervous breakdown she exclaimed, "We didn't sleep together if that's what you are insinuating!"

Octavia blinked in surprise a few times and then openly gawked at her. "You sooo did! You slept with the commander!"

"No, I didn't!" Clarke said defiantly. "I only wanted to but she wouldn't let me!"

She slapped a hand over her mouth for such idiocy. If there had been any way to burn herself more than this, she couldn't think of it.

"Oh my God!" said Octavia giddily. "She _rejected_ you? Wait till I tell the others!"

She went to leave with the proof in hand and Clarke completely freaked out and attacked her. On the ground outside of the tent now, they began struggling over the bearskin and drawing a crowd around them.

"Give it back!" cried Clarke.

"No way!" yelled Octavia.

"What is this nonsense?" said Indra.

Octavia stopped fighting her and looked up with a sheepish expression. Then she jumped up and faced her mentor head on, doing her best to look stoic but failing with such a juicy piece of gossip on the tip of her tongue.

Indra glanced down at Clarke and then back at Octavia. "Why does the Sky Princess have the commander's bearskin?"

The growing crowd began muttering about this development and Clarke was sure the world was about to end, and was only too glad. At least then she wouldn't have to feel so impossibly embarrassed. She couldn't bear to be scrutinized anymore so she pulled the sweaty bearskin over her blood red face and waited for a swift death.

"Well," said Octavia gleefully, "last night-"

"Klok kom Skaikru en ai don teina. That is why she has my pelt."

There was an unnervingly loud silence following this pronouncement, followed by many mutterings of 'Heda'. Footsteps approached and then, "Arise, Clarke. The ground is no place for the commander's chosen."

Clarke pulled the covering off and gazed up at an impassive and clean faced Lexa. If she was embarrassed by this situation, she wasn't letting on in the slightest. Clarke knew Lexa would not dare help her up, so she steadied her nerves and somehow managed on her own.

Lexa nodded once and then headed in the direction of her tent. Clarke wasn't sure if she was supposed to follow or not, but she sure as hell wasn't going to stay around the likes of Octavia! Though she was pleased to note that the girl looked like her favourite sword had been taken away from her and shattered into a million pieces.

Inside, Lexa poured a glass of something amber in colour and held it out to her. She exchanged it for the pelt and said, "What is this?"

Lexa threw the pelt on her bed and turned back to say, "A remedy for the thunder."

Clarke expected it to taste horrible, but it was actually pretty pleasant and fruity. She consumed it in a few gulps and was disappointed when it didn't immediately cure her killer headache. Then with nothing else happening and Lexa simply staring at her, she felt intensely awkward and fiddled with the cup.

"Why did you lie, Lexa?"

"Would you have preferred I allowed Octavia to tell the truth as she so clearly desired?"

"No," she conceded after a moments thought. Clarke bit her lip. "About last night...I'm _really_ sorry...that must have been even more awkward for you than it was for me to remember today."

"Jus slip daun is very potent. You would be wise to use caution next time you partake."

Clarke shook her head. "I don't think I'm _ever_ drinking again."

The corners of Lexa's lips twitched slightly. "You grow wiser every moment, Clarke."

"Also..."

"Go on."

Clarke held her gaze. "Thank you for being a perfect gentle...woman. It means a lot that you were so respectful...even though I wasn't."

"You were not yourself. I only wish to be with you when you are Clarke of the sky people," her eyes flashed playfully, "not Clarke of the cry people."

Clarke laughed, more out of surprise than because it was actually funny. "Was that a joke, Lexa?"

"Joke?" she replied, obviously pleased with herself for eliciting this response.

Clarke was pretty sure she understood her meaning but elaborated anyway. "You know, when you say something with the intent of making the other person laugh."

"Ah, leife.* This is our word for such a thing."

She laughed again.

"This is amusing to you too?"

"Yes...no...I just didn't think grounders had a sense of humour."

"We are not always in times of war, Clarke. Sometimes we even play music and dance."

Finally something like relief swept over her poor skull and she couldn't help but smile. "So, now what?"

"Now we attend to our duties. There is much work to be done yet."

"No, I mean, what about _us_? What's _our_ next move?"

Lexa studied her for a bit and then took a step closer. "What do you desire it to be?"

"Well, Lexa," she said with a smirk, "since you told everyone that we're together, I think we have no choice but to actually _be_ together."

"Yes, Clarke," said Lexa closing the rest of the gap between them, putting a hand on her waist, "you are certainly growing wiser."

They kissed a little more passionately than the previous time, and then right at the height of her pleasure Maxin barged in again saying, "Heda! Come quickly! Trouble brews on Mount Weather!"

Lexa whirled around, giving him a murderous glare, to which he quailed at. "Forgive me, Heda!" He looked at Clarke like he couldn't believe she had not been cast into exile for defiling his leader with salty water. "I did not know you were with the sky princess again!"

"That is why you are required to ask permission before entering my chambers," she said low and dangerous.

Maxin backed out of the tent and Lexa turned back to her and sighed, the first time Clarke could recall hearing such a defeated sound from her. Lexa rested their foreheads together for a few more seconds and then pulled back and said, "I must away."

"I'm coming with."

Lexa nodded and then they hurried out together, a faint smile on both women's lips. Clarke had a funny feeling that everything would be fine between them from here on out. If Lexa still wanted her after last night's _and_ this morning's pathetic displays, there was probably nothing Clarke could do to sway her mind otherwise. And this knowledge made her happier than she had been in quite some time.

* * *

**'Klok kom Skaikru en ai don teina' means something like Clarke of The Sky People and I have entwined/come together.**

**'Jus slip daun' basically says blood fall.**

***I dunno, made some shit up.**

**Thanks for reading this silly thing. And I hope you enjoyed it. :) If you want to read the rest you can find it on fanfiction.net. My pen name there is Demosthenes23. I'm not going to re-post that entire thing (mostly cuz it's not done :p). And anyway, this was the way it was supposed to end before I got browbeaten into continuing it. :p Fair warning though, the story does a 180 pretty much in terms of genre.  
**


End file.
